Mad Skillz

I’m a really good driver. Ask anyone who ever road with me back in my Camry. I was a great reverser and liked going fast down long, curvy roads. Granted, I was a teenager, but still, I pretty much ruled the road/world.

Then downtown life hit. I sold my car and haven’t really looked back since. Till Joe and I moved in together, that is. With Joe, came a car. Life should become easier, no? No. Not only do I get incredibly anxious when anyone else drives, I can’t drive his huge ass vehicle (full disclosure: it is a Ford Fusion). I mean, I can, he let’s me and all, but take today as an example. I was to be at a Networking event for Women in Technology, which I was sort of looking forward to. I went out to the parking garage and got in the car. I put it in reverse, backed up, and realized there was no way in hell I could get myself out of that situation. I know that I am being laughed at as I type this, so I will draw a picture.

I’m the pink car, because pink is my favorite color. I pulled in along the pink line, but as you’ll notice, the light blue car came in afterwards, and I could no longer get myself out. I pulled out and back in a few times, to no avail. I dropped my head, turned off the car, and went back inside. It sure didn’t help that it was prime rush hour time leaving a downtown Minneapolis lot… people were staring. I called Joe, embarrassed. He told me to just keep wiggling and getting out to check, even if I had to do so every ten seconds. I was defeated though… and really just wanted him to listen and not problem solve for me. He did send me a kind text though…

I’m being sarcastic if you couldn’t tell.

I went back into the apartment, cracked a beer, and watched Damages. It felt good.

Then I pulled myself together, because, wtf, it’s just a car and just a parking spot you little pussy (I said to myself).

This time it worked, on the first try nonetheless. Granted, I needed to see-saw about 4 times, I did not even bump anyone else. Had it been my car, my nice, small, normal-person sized car, I wouldn’t have been as worried about it. But, I think the fact that Joe still has car payments makes me that much more nervous. Plus, it is fricken huge.

And, now as I’m typing this, I just remembered I forgot to fill up on gas and it was already on empty before my journey to Saint Paul. Sooorrrrry Joe…

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