Oh Honey

So last night I went out to dinner at the Bachelor Farmer with Joe and a friend from work. Conversation was really flowing well, until my last trip to the bar was brought up. I think I was making some snide comment about having been to Marvel a few times, with all the guys I go out with and what not. My friend and Joe had a little laugh about that, and then she felt the need to remind me that no, I probably don’t go out with other guys because I was a sobber-fest when him and I were apart for just two weeks. To emphasize my bad-assery, I explained that it was I who initiated the conversation with Justin at the bar. Joe tried to put on his fake jealousy face so I played into it. “What??” I said “I just needed help spelling a word!” My coworker jumped in to say that there are other sources to find correct spellings, especially when one is on a computer with internet access. So, I had to tell the story from the start.

Weeks ago, I walked in to Rock Bottom, minding my own business, intending to get some writing done for the evening. I chose my spot based solely on the placement of the TV’s; I wanted to make sure I could watch the Twin’s game, duh, and only one TV was playing it. I happened to be sitting right next to a guy, but it was a mostly full bar so that was fine. After a while of being deep into my work, I came to an impasse. I was stuck on the spelling of a word, and Google couldn’t even help me. This is because I’m really a genius with all things except for spelling, I swear. I kept going with wrip, and other various spellings that I can no longer come up with because I know how to spell it now. Anyway, I look over to this guy and I interupt “I’ve got a weird question to ask you… how do you spell rip? As in… like… ripping of a bandaid?” I got a blank stare for a few seconds, and finally he responded “R-I-P…” Ahh, okay, that makes sense. “Thanks!” and then I returned to my writing.

Except him and I began talking a little bit more after that, and he ultimately bought me a drink. I was explaining that the reason he bought me the drink was because I was such awesome company. However, Joe and my friend argued that he thought he was getting laid. I fought this for quite awhile, because I don’t indeed believe I was hitting on him, I truly needed to know how to spell the word. They claim, though, that no one needs to know how to spell rip because it is the easiest word in the world. My friend suggested that a harder word would be more justifiable, but I denied that on the basis that a more complicated word would more likely result in spell check suggestions. She compared it to a guy asking a girl “how to I spell THE?” and it not being a pick up line. Joe offered that all week Justin probably complained to his friends “and she asked me how to spell rip – she was hitting on me, and then nothing even happened.”

After a lot and back and fourth, I concluded that maybe Justin interpreted it as a pick up line and I was wrong to accept the drink when I had no intentions of taking him home.

On a completely separate random note: earlier in the evening, I was sitting on the floor of the office clipping my nails. I don’t what made it enter my mind, but I looked up at Joe and asked “how lame would it be if we celebrated our birthdays together?” Trying to play it off like maybe a couple I knew had been planning on doing that exact thing. He just started laughing and probably didn’t stop for a good five minutes. He thinks he can see right through me and he is so wrong.

Anyway, we will be having a joint birthday party this year, and I’m totes excited for it :)

After dinner we stopped off for a night cap because it was such a beautiful evening. In the midst of making flirty eyes with each other, I say “you know what I’m most excited to go home for?… … … … Buncha crunch!” A look of disappointment took over his face and he just said “I thought you were going to say sexy time” I responded with “oh honey…”  It’s bittersweet to reach this point…


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